Its been quite a battle and its something i have to fight everyday of my life. Quite reminded of PoeticJourney, we all get parts of our journey that are similar to others. As i got older i developed irritable bowl syndrome. Its not curable for starters!
It has almost destroyed my day to day life in the last 3 weeks had i not just endured through the horrific pain with a smile. Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) is a disorder that leads to abdominal pain and cramping, changes in bowel movements, and other symptoms. The intestine is connected to the brain. Signals go back and forth between the bowel and brain. These signals affect bowel function and symptoms. The nerves can become more active during stress, causing the intestines to be more sensitive and squeeze (contract) more. At times it gets so bad i cannot stand up, the pain is just crippling. I remember one time i was at work and IBS started causing cramps and stomach pains. I could not stand up and my workmate had to hire a taxi for me to go home. The last 3 weeks have been hell, just wish i would sleep and not feel this pain. Doctors aren’t helping really. As it cannot be cured they seem not to be concerned about looking for treatments to reduce symptoms. Dieticians seem to know that this problem spans decades and they aren’t making it any cheaper to get help. Sigh ****
Its moments in the day where i come from smiling to gripping my stomach as if something is growing inside me. I cant have a regular life where i go out with friends and eat hot dogs, or eat anything just for the sake of eating, who knows what that stuff has. I am even having issues with red meat, caffeine, eggs, broccoli, fizzy drinks, you name it! Am i going the vegetarian route? At times i wonder how can i even hope of marrying if i have this thing that can cause me to ruin a day at moments notice. One night i was woken up by this crazy pain in my office and i tried to get out of my bed but i fell out because i could not stand. I crawled out of my room, i didn’t know where i was going, but i wanted to go far away from the pain. for about 5 minutes i was just crawling in the dark until the pain started going away. I sat in the lounge for the rest of the night.
Looking at the internet, stuff i can do to reduce symptoms, so much to learn and research before stuff gets better. I have to do it and through all of it the pain will be a reminder of what really is underlying the craziness.
Last Sunday i went to church, i pick up 4 guys (attonbitus included) to go to church. I didn’t want to go that day because i was sick as a dog. But just like any other day, i walked out of the house and got on with my day. Got to church and i had ask to be excused from serving but since most of my team mates where away i had to help. Got the worst shouting i have seen at church for setting up certain venues late. Of course i look quite normal when you are looking at me but you do not know the amount of pain i am hiding as i am carrying those crates and cables. Its easy to judge a sickness you cannot see and deem it nothing. I understand now PoeticJourney, really do!