Reflecting back on 2014

Posted: January 1, 2015 in Quote of the day

2014 has been a year where much has transpired, both good and bad. Looking at my original position at the beginning of the year; much of what transpired came as a surprise if not all. Some of the greater lessons i learnt over the year came from the human seat of dishonesty and selfishness.  Some also came from human compassion, loyalty and sacrifice that is not called for.

I got pressured and broken so much this year i walked a fine line between losing it all and breaking the threshold and gaining more. Much about how i had structured myself as an individual both emotionally and mentally presented such roadblocks to transcending my character. I had lived under such a cloud that i had never seen how much my assumed strengths were in actual fact strong faults. It took the selfishness and deceit of a cherished person to rip out my sense of security and leave me out for dead. But instead of dying i found will to live, to become better and to evolve past the treachery. The bad of 2014 which ended up the good of 2014 for in it lied such great opportunities for character correction.

Trial after trial battered me to the point of realisation and I chose to rewire myself instead of breaking down. Its not easy to accept that at the core one is broken and at my age rewriting years of history, character and habits seemed unreasonable but one thing I had now acquired was an overwhelming sense of will. I had to do it, i had to become better. I had to evolve and I did. I have now tapped into my raw energy not hindered by perks of character, a problem i had dragged around for a decade due to mental and emotional defences i could no longer dismantle. The good of 2014 assuredly. Losing a dear trusted and cherished friend was the bad of 2014, having been friends for 6 years and now he is not around anymore. Words can never express my gratitude to this man, what he sacrificed for me and what he birthed in me. The bad of 2014 but memories cry live on and prosper.

I found friends in people who I had never imagined to be friends, or i had never given the chance. They chose to sacrifice their time and effort to stand by me in a transformation that pushed me on the boundaries of insanity. Not always being able to handle me, they faithfully held on to me so that I had a beacon to look at no matter how dark my transformation became. For that I am eternally thankful because it reminds me that not everyone is maniacal and selfish. I will never forget your sacrifice for me, touching glowing red embers and not letting go, my loyalty you have for life. I chose not to hate or become condescending after my trials, for many people by nature are broken, untrustworthy and selfish, rather I am thankful i now developed the eyes to see past the web of deceit instead of hating and carrying a burden over years which would be of no benefit.

2015, greeted with hope, warm hands and optimism. I am ready to go above what I have been to shine in ways i have never imagined.

What i am feeling right now

Posted: September 22, 2014 in Quote of the day

He broke my heart
And now it’s raining just to rub it in
Im at your door
I feel so crazy ’bout it

Youll say, “I told you so”, you saw it long ago
You knew he had to go
I finally came around, Im back on solid ground
Cant let it get me down

It’s alright, it’s alright, it’s alright
It’s alright, it’s alright, it’s alright

Yes, I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned so I called it a lesson learned
My soul has returned so I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

Sometimes some lies
Can take a minute to fully realize
His tears, your eyes
30 seconds to apologize

You give it one more chance just like the time before
But he already knows you’d give a hundred more
Until that night in bed, you wake up in a sweat
You’re racing to the door, cant take it anymore

I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned so I called it a lesson learned
My soul has returned so I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

A life perfect aint perfect
If you dont know what the struggle’s for
Falling down aint falling down
If you dont cry when you hit the floor

It’s called the past ’cause Im getting past
And I aint nothing like I was before
You oughta see me now

Yes, I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned so I called it a lesson learned
My soul has returned so I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

Whoa, said yes, I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
(It’s alright, it’s alright)
Said mistake overturned so I called it a lesson learned
(It’s alright, it’s alright)
My soul has returned so I call it a lesson learned, oh lesson learned
(It’s alright, it’s alright)
Oh, lesson learned
(It’s alright, it’s alright)

It’s alright, it’s alright, it’s alright
It’s alright, it’s a lesson learned
It’s alright, it’s alright, it’s alright

Read more: Alicia Keys – Lesson Learned Lyrics | MetroLyrics

Gym gym gym

Posted: February 19, 2014 in Quote of the day

So in the name of good health i started going to the gym. Its been good, but today i got a different trainer. Guy looks like a wrecking ball (sorry Miley) and he drives a mean training regime. 

Am i suppose to be able to scratch my back with my hands because surely they dont feel like they are there. The humanity. Sigh No pain no gain, well put into retrospect more pain = close to death at your hands.

Will be going back tomorrow :) 

Once upon a time

Posted: February 16, 2014 in Quote of the day

I started a story, i think its time to finish it :). How have all of you been ?

If you like to know

Posted: November 25, 2013 in Quote of the day

http://21stjourneys.wordpress.com/

Every night…..

Posted: November 21, 2013 in General Topics

In your arms i sleep,

In your arms i have found peace,

I can’t sleep if i don’t feel you next to me,

Every night, like i have dreamt in times of solitude,

I rest in the embrace of my beloved.

 

Every night, i hear your voice,

See your face and your smile….

hear you talking, laughing….

Every night, like a dream you make me fall in love with you more…..

 

You are the sun… The moon.. The stars…

Every moment, Every night, you have touched my heart…

Buried yourself deep in it, made it your home…

Every night, every moment, my heart is yours #EZ

 

Lost without you

Posted: November 2, 2013 in Quote of the day

Every morning is like Christmas morning,

waking up to hear your voice in distant slumber..

Anticipating a  wonderful day i look at you sleep,

smiling as you open your eyes to meet my gaze.

 

Every moment i miss a step my heart bleeds,

for i do not want to be far from you my queen,

I do not want to feel a cold breeze between us,

Like when you slumber i want to be that close to you always..

 

Close enough like when i feel you breathing as you sleep,

close enough like then i feel your warmth…

Apple of my eye, my heart belongs to you,

banished to the motion of sand in a desert without you

 

Love of my life, my moon in the night sky,

my morning star, my precious sun I cannot be without you,

ringing in my mind you do each time like a reminder that will never leave me,

seeing you where i look, making me think of you constantly.

Cut my heart open love, and see how much you have written yourself on its inner walls.

 

Every morning taking time to embrace the scent of your fingers,

a part of me i cannot be without….. Elzette I cannot be without you….

I am so lost without you i feel like my walls are falling in,

left naked to a coming blizzard,

I never want to be away from you, your warm embrace

your tender smile and your calming voice.

 

There is no river i cannot cross if you are with me,

You are my strength and i am lost without you,

Because you are the woman who has my heart,

no matter i how stumble and fall,

no matter how much i fail,

my heart is yours and to your arms do i run my queen

for you are “she” that i am lost without

 

 

<3